April 4th, 2005

tea time

(no subject)

so i just got finished with a 40 minute panic attack. Today is the Spike Lee thing and they want me doing 25 million things. I get here and they tell me to leave. and i just start crying and talk to mrs. brown and she doesnt know what is going on. Then Marc comes over and we start talking about everything. It's insane. I feel like shit. I am physically and mentally exhausted. I want to sleep and sleep. If I wasn't such a fucking responsible person I wouldnt be here right now. I am wasting time until I go where I am supposed to go. First of all they tell me to be at the ballroom at 5 but if i do that then i miss the VIP dinner that i was invited to. I am just freaking out. I want to scream. Marc made sence of things for me. He is the student gov't advisor and i really like him. We always have good talks and its nice to talk to someone who can make you see another side. He always tries to make me laugh when I am stressed out and he listens to me. He is my mentor person, i guess. Mrs. Baker was my mentor in high school. She was my 11th grade gov/econ teacher and we were really close. I am so blah right now. I just need to breathe. I wish that tristia wasnt at work so she could be with me. Wooptee. At least I get to meet Spike Lee, he did She Hate Me.. and i dont have a camera. that blows.
life sucks.
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