October 26th, 2005

tea time

frustration

i dont feel like making 100 cookies today. i feel very overwhelmed and frustrated with the daily demands of life. work is really busy right now so i'm constantly going which is good b/c the time flies by but its bad because i can't keep up with cafe cooking b/c i am doing so much catering stuff. i dont know what i will do when P has surgery. cry.
i got a friend request on myspace from this girl that i really dont like and i can't fucking believe she sought me out as a friend. i hate seeing her picture or even thinking about her so why the fuck would i want you as my friend? i dont like bitches who try to 'woo' my girl when i am at work. (yes, i am still not over it) fucker. stay in Cali.
i only did 1/2 of the studying needed for the Sociology test today. I didnt even start on the German homework. yesterday was just really long and i had no time to do anything it seemed. i went to bed at 8:30 and was up at 4:45. Why am I not at work already? I decided I wanted to eat breakfast and play online. I hope that I won't be behind because I wasn't there at 5 as I had hoped. i really need to head out now. another day of working hard.
  • Current Music
    Castles in the Sky from Tom's MySpace
tea time

BAD BILLI

I skipped German in order to make up my Sociology studying since I have a test. I will just do the homework and email it to her. fuck. today was insane. i hate when people are sick. i cant help but be bitter when we are so fucking busy and someone wants to go home. then i have to work on overdrive with finishing cutting 120 pieces of bread and running register, making sandwiches/salads, and generally being a smiley person. WITH A TIME LIMIT.. i have to be out early to go to class (even tho i skipped, damn me) so i really had a hell of a lot to do with like ZERO time it seemed and then i had to jet out of the YWCA leaving P to do the catering order and deliver. this is why we should hire someone who is flexible. it sucks having to work around others schedules. next semester the classes that i need are in the morning and i dont know how that's gonna fly with me needing to work at the YW.
i think i am gonna write and submit something for the transgender monologues. sometimes i just dont feel like my stories are good enough or transy enough. i have so many stories about friends and tristia and i could make a book.. but what is good enough to share? What do people want to hear about? first time i saw her binding? when she stood up in front of the whole MBLGTACC and said she was genderless? or do i talk about going with my friend to the Dr to get his first prescription of Testosterone and the way Rite-Aid acted, the first shot? the changes in him? what is important? what is interesting? to me its special moments but to many it might not even matter. ahh.. so confused.
  • Current Mood
    confused confused
tea time

not so much

You Are Likely A Forth Born

At your darkest moments, you feel angry.
At work and school, you do best when your analyzing.
When you love someone, you tend to be very giving.

In friendship, you don't take the initiative in reaching out.
Your ideal jobs are: factory jobs, comedy, and dentistry.
You will leave your mark on the world with your own personal philosophy.