November 23rd, 2005


grr Good Morning

off to work i go, off to work i go. I am really tired having taken some muscle relaxers before bed because my back was hurting. I am so frustrated. I never got the number to Hamilton, so today I must find it myself so that I can HOPEFULLY get in to see someone today about this lump situation. I kind of want to go to MY doctor and throw a fucking fit about how stupid he is that he ignores me. On top of the fact that they sent me a bill saying that the insurance company said i dont exist, which is PATHETIC. so what the fuck. Today will be long. work, school, shopping. tomorrow is thanksgiving and i guess i am going to my grandmothers the first part of the day and then to tristia's family in the afternoon. Guaranteed to be an adventure. Lots of eats. I forgot to mention that i did 2 panels the other day. I think the first one definitely did better than the second one. it was really stupid and the prof asked most of the questions, exaggerated stupid questions, and the class just talked about Job Corps the majority of the time. Someone asked me if I actually 'look like that' all the time. WTF is that supposed to mean? I never realized I was that BAD looking or whatever. Anyway, I don't think I will be doing any other panels for her and I only did these because she asked me directly. It's always good to do things when someone asks you, I guess, but I am learning that NO is an acceptable answer. I find that I am not an interesting panel member sometimes depending on the dynamics. I felt like I was really wasting my time in the 2nd one because everyone was so hung up on the 'pretty girl'. There was another guy on there with us who was conservative and gay. That was really odd for me because I just couldn't relate to his ideas at all about staying in the closet because people weren't meant to see it. Hearing a gay person say that YES the bible does forbid our existance is completely fucking weird.. that was said by a different panel person. Anywa, I need to get back to stuff.
Good day to you all!
  • Current Mood
    angry angry
tea time

It is snowing and I feel blah

Today it is really snowing here. It looks amazing though. I like watching it from the inside. :)
I went to the Doctor.. my regular doctor office. My insurance requires me to see my primary physician for preexisting conditions and the fact that he has been 'treating' me for it. My options were to go see him and get a referral to another primary, get a referral to a specialist, or just fucking see him. So, I called the office and he is out today and there is a sub doctor. I definitely was like get me in. So, at 10:30 I went and saw this other doctor. Ok, back up a little, I researched online first to see what it MIGHT be. Then Gina printed out some things for me about Pilonidal disease. She had a condition like mine before. Ok, back to the doctor. He asks what's going on, I told him that Dr. R has been looking at it since March. He asked me what did I think it was, and I told him I thought it was Pilonidal. (its a very painful cyst that grows on tailbone and has to be surgically removed in most cases) He had me lay down on my stomach (which my doctor never did) and he thoroughly examined the area, even pressing on it which hurts so bad. Then he said he thought the same thing and talked to me about treatment. Basically, warm baths and this solution stuff. Back in 10 days to see Dr. R and if its not better I should get a referral to a surgeon. I was so glad that he actually talked to me about it and he had one before so he understood the situation. Mine isn't as big as most (THANK GOD) so it may not be operable yet. I might have to wait until it gets larger, which sucks. i read up and it says it doesnt go away. at no point. antibiotics dont help it either. So, basically, the options are to live with it or get it removed. Ah, the options. I dont really want to be cut on right there because it will hurt a lot when its done. and i hear it smells really bad, too. At leat i know what the hell it is, right. I went to get the solution thing filled.. and I CANT. my insurance doesn't cover this type of medication. so I guess I am just gonna rough it til I go to the doctor again. fuckers.
back to its snowing.. YAY.. sort of. Tom is sick and missed the student gov't board meeting. i am so sad. i wanted to love on him. I really hope it doesnt snow a whole lot. I really dont want to drive so much in the snow but I promised Gary a shopping trip today.
  • Current Mood
    relieved relieved
tea time

Billi's 'Wish' List

Step One - Make a post (public, friends-locked, filtered ... whatever you're comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want. - If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you. - Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ, or link to this post (it'll be public) so that the holiday joy will spread.

Step Two - Surf around your friends list (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part: - If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use - or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free - do it. You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf - to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not - it's your call. There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just ... wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.

1. The book.. Drinking Coffee Elsewhere
2. earrings (i hate gold)
3. tongue rings - metal posts only
4. Printer cartridges (great idea carrie) 93 HP Vivera
5. Blank Note Cards or stationary - i like to send cards/letters
6. Anything Queer
7. L Word Season 1 on DVD
8. Photo Paper - not super glossy though
9. Almost any book on Amnesty International book list
10. scrapbook supplies - anything
  • Current Mood
    sick sick