BILLI (billinaction) wrote,

  • Mood:


trying to seriously add all my upcoming events into my planner that i have sadly neglected. i am getting to be even more busy than i ever thought i would be and i dont want to miss/forget events i am interested it. It sucks. I see like a million days where I have 5 things going on. CRY CRY! but at least i will be working more.. this has its ups and downs.. ups because $$ is always good.. and downs because its less time to work on all my other things. I seriously have to kick ass in my poli sci class b/c the student gov't advisor is checkin our grades and if we are overly involved at school and slacking on school work, we lose our position. I think that is a good plan but it also sucks. because i know that my grades suck do to my other obligations sometimes. i just like to be everywhere, doing everything. I like that. It makes me feel worthy. eh.
yesterday was so damn stressful I dont want to ever look at apartments. I dont care where I live. I just want us to be happy and have our own space. It has been a really long time since I have felt that I had a home with someone. I just want to feel that I am where I belong. Tristia's mother is going to get an apartment in her name for us. Do you know how much that means to us? I feel really glad that she is willing to help us, I really didn't think that she would. She called me Jaime last night (tris ex) and it made me cry. For a long time I wondered if her mom liked me or wished I was more like Jaime. I am not close with her family like I was with Roxanne's. That is a little weird. They don't communicate well, so I dont really open up and talk to them. They dont talk to me much either. So, I think her mom wishes I was more like jaime and that is sort of sad. I love jaime, she is my buddy, i just dont want to be anyone but me, and i want that to be okay and accepted by tristia and her family. A few moments after her mom called me that.. tristia did too. This didnt help anything. Movie night ended up being cancelled because no one went. Tris and i were stuck with her broke down car and it was a disaster. Roxanne finally called me back about giving me my stuff. We talked about other things, life. It was nice to hear from her.. just knowing she is alright and happy. GOOD FOR HER!
I think I am allergic to a particular something that I didnt think I would ever have an allergy to. and its weird and i dont know how to remedy it. GRR!
anyway thanks for everyone for everything you do with the GSA and with the protest. I heart everyone.
now i am starving and tris is out of class.. FOOOD!!
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