BILLI (billinaction) wrote,

Chef Billi

now presenting.. THANKGIVING DINNER! I will be cooking for the rest of my afternoon once I get out of school.. I have student gov't today. blah on that!! I worked last night and that was okay. Tristia came and saw me at work and it made me smile, she never comes up there. I wasn't feeling well, so it made the night a lil better. When I got home Roxanne came over and we had a long talk about relationships. hers and mine. and how she wishes that we could all just get along and that Jen wouldn't have to be an outsider. I hate that I can't like Jen. I really just can't. I am going to make every effort, though, to be nice. I truly am going to try not to be the woman scorned and just accept this girl whom i detest. I may not like her but I can't keep ignoring her existance. She hates that Roxanne and I spend time together and even Roxanne and Tristia are friends. So, adding jen i think, will make everyone uncomfortable, when we have been doing well. BUT, it isn't fair because she gives roxanne a really hard time about us hanging out and i wish she could just be happy that roxanne has friends. Look at it not that I am the evil ex and that tristia was her one time obsession, but look at us as friends of roxannes. trust me, i know that will be hard on her. i just dont know how i can look at her as anyone other than the woman i was left for. how can i sit and have coffee with you knowing that you fucked up something that meant everythign to me. roxanne keeps programming me that she didnt leave me for jen, they got together after the fact. whatever.
ah. anyway, i am in a better place, a happy place. i have the girl i love and i am content with it. life is fabulous. cant wait for tonight! dinner and dragkings!!

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