we did those 2 panels for the human relations class yesterday. the first one consisted of 5 people. Tris, me, G,R, and P. It was really interesting because tristia and I got to elaborate on trans things and the terms 'queer' and 'genderbender'. It was good times. There was one girl in the first class that was so abrasive, its like, we aren't here to hurt you, relax. The second class was full of sportsy men and they were totally thrown off by the entire group. There was me, Tris, Dave, P,R, and B. R is bi, B is gay man, P is lesbian. So there was a variety of us to try to educate this class. This class scored very low on the gay tolerance survey that the teacher gave them. So, we knew we had work to do. They were slow at asking questions but when they did some of them were intelligent. There was one guy that i always see around and he kept staring at me, and i was like WTF. He asked had any of us been physically abused because of our orientations.. and i wanted to ask if he recognized us from beating us up. It was weird. Another guy asked if we had bad experiences with men that made us lesbian/queer. Everyone loves to tell me I should be with a man if my attractions are more towards the masculine women. I hate that. I don't not like bio men for the reason that have penis's. They just dont attract me. There is something about 'butch' women that just makes me smile. i am really drawn to that. It's hard to explain to a class of straight people. One girl actually asked how could we get any pleasure out of sex. WOAH! i'm like that is the craziest thing that I have ever been asked. This was Tristia's first experiences with panels. I think that she really held her own. There were some good questions for her about how she dresses and is she the man in the relationship. (we didnt let on that we were together)She was very knowledgable in her facts about her own identity and about general info about the LGBT community. I was very impressed with her. I think that we all did an excellent job and I can't wait to do it again. I have to pull 2 panels together for next week, too. yippee Also, we went to the Kiss My Gender practice session thingy last night. It was good times. I really like the guys/gals associated with Drag King Rebellion. They really make me smile. I was thinking a lot while I sat there just watching everyone be themselves. I remember asking Carrie if I was going to be treated differently by the T* community once it became known that i was not transgender. She told me to be wary. I guess a lot of T* people don't want nontrans allies sometimes. So, I was thinking last night about how did i fit into this community of mostly trans people and drag performers. i was one of the 3 people who was not in the show in some form or identifying as something other than born gender. I realize that made me different. I feel closer with the trans community than with any other LGBT community that I am involved in. It feels more of a safe space to me, i don't have to conform or whatnot.. but i sense that sometimes i will not be liked. What the world needs to see is that SOFFA's are just as important in this movement for acceptance. I am not accusing anyone of treating me differently or singling me out, I was just thinking about this stuff last night..while I was surrounded by cuteness. I just want a place to call my own. heh. Went back to the Dr and my Xrays are all negative, apparently nothing is wrong with my shoulder. How odd because it still hurts me, I still can't move certain ways. Must just be something pulled or whatever. While we were in the office, Dr. Razzak looked at Tristia and asks ' and how are you young man' and then looks down and says 'lady'. It was funny. she didnt even correct him or anything but her face turned red and i just laughed. If you had seen her yesterday you would have wondered. With white button up shirt and black tie. it was sexy. alright. i have to go read my coming out story to my HREL 299 class. Will see you all tomorrow hopefully.